How To Make A Guy Fall In Love With Your Mind—Not Just Your Looks!

There’s something thrilling about when a guy finds your mind attractive. 

Being attracted to your body is also great, but nothing can beat that mind attraction.

And I’m not talking about him being a sapiosexual; he doesn’t have to be for this to happen.

I’m talking about that strong connection with someone’s mind that makes you enjoy their company, not because you want to get in their pants but because you love how they think and appreciate the opportunity to pick their brains.

And you know the good thing about having this?

Even if you experience body changes – which happens with time – you can be sure your man will not shift because his attraction to you is beyond your looks anyway.

If I’ve successfully convinced you that this is a far sexy way to attract a man, read along for different ways to make a guy fall for your mind.

12 Practical Ways To Make A Guy Fall In Love with Your Mind

1. Read Widely

Being intelligent is largely a matter of genes; some people have a higher IQ than others, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

However, you can engage your mind through reading and increase your chances of sharpening it.

There’s so much knowledge hidden within the pages of books that you can benefit from.

So, don’t bother so much about your IQ; read.

In fact, even naturally intelligent people can be dumber if they are too ignorant.

If you read widely, you’ll be able to engage in intellectual conversations because you will know a little about many things, which is what you should be gunning for anyway.

You don’t have to know everything or everything about everything, but you should be able to hold a conversation on most topics and know the basics about most things.

Besides being attractive to a man, it will help you get ahead in your career and life because you will have a broader perspective and more creative ideas.

Often, some men complain about lacking stimulating conversation with women.

If you can hold your own during a conversation because you’re widely read, you’ll show him you are different without trying too hard.

That will make him want to speak to you more because he knows he’ll enjoy the conversation and learn something new whenever he’s around you.

2. Show Interest in His Passions and Hobbies

I know what you’re thinking; “Do I have to become a sports fangirl when I have no interest in sports?”

No, thankfully!

That’s not what it means because, like you, I’m not interested in that either.

What this means is to be supportive.

Talk to him about his passions and hobbies, and listen when he speaks about them. 

Ask him questions and let him know you are interested in what makes him happy.

You should also ask follow-up questions so he knows you have him in mind.

For instance, if he tells you he’s going hiking, text him beforehand to ask how he’s preparing and then after to ask how it went.

That way, he’d know that you are a strong woman who doesn’t just fancy his hobby but is ready to support him through it.

Thoughtfulness is appealing.

3. Be His Friend

I once heard something that initially sounded confusing, but after I thought about it made a lot of sense.

The saying goes, “Don’t just marry who loves you but who likes you.”

I know you are probably thinking, “Isn’t this a given? If he loves me, doesn’t that mean he likes me?”

I don’t think they are always mutually inclusive because love is a commitment, while liking someone is more natural.

We like our friends, so we love them, but Christians, for example, understand that we have been told to love our enemies, which means you don’t have to like someone to love them.

However, when you like someone, you automatically love them.

This means if he’s your friend, chances are he’ll like you.

When we like people, it’s often not about their looks but their minds and personality.

So, befriend him.

Let him consider you a friend with the potential of something more as opposed to just a romantic partner.

4. Be Emotionally Intelligent

While IQ is based on genetics, EQ is based on nurture.

People nurtured to be emotionally intelligent as children would naturally have an edge over those who weren’t raised that way.

However, that doesn’t mean you can’t nurture it in yourself as an adult.

You just have to want it badly and intentionally nurture the qualities.

Emotionally intelligent people know what to say, how to say it, and when to say it.

They also know how to act and when to act.

They are in tune with others and have exceptional people relationships.

Many people gravitate towards them because they know how to handle people’s emotions.

You can learn it, too, and you are likely to find the man you want drawn to how skillful you are at dealing with him and others.

5. Be Independent

Relationships function better when both of you are interdependent, not codependent.

That is, two independent and whole humans coming together to depend on each other when necessary and remain independent when necessary.

If you want a man to fall in love with your mind, you need to be able to hold your own as a woman.

Have something going for you: career, business, or school.

If your world revolves around him, you’d soon become uninteresting to him.

Have friends, interests, and hobbies that you don’t completely let go of because of him.

Sure, you can join him to participate in his hobbies occasionally, but there’s nothing attractive about a woman who loses herself entirely for a man.

6. Be Yourself

Authenticity is attractive.

When someone is unapologetically themselves, it shines through and makes them attractive to other genuine people.

Of course, this doesn’t mean everybody you come across will like you.

For a woman like this, you are likely to be too opinionated for some men.

However, you’ll attract the right kind of men who like your personality, quirks, and idiosyncrasies.

Imagine spending your whole life acting in a stage play because you created a false image to make a man like you – the horror!

So, be yourself.

If he likes women with your personality, he’ll automatically love your personality more than if he were just attracted to your looks.

7. Be Confident

A confident woman is attractive.

It goes across domestic relationships to the workplace.

You can’t make a man fall in love with your mind when you don’t even think you are worth it in the first place. If he didn’t mind how insecure you are initially, it’s only a matter of time before it gets old.

So, if you battle with low self-esteem, you need to work on it by probably going to therapy so you can confidently love and be loved.

A man will not fall for the mind of a woman who doesn’t understand how much she rocks.

8. Appreciate Him

We attract the energy we give out.

When you appreciate someone, they are likely to appreciate you too.

This goes beyond saying thank you when he does something for you.

It includes it, but it’s much more than that.

In this context, appreciating him is to make him feel loved and cared for.

This might be hard for some women to digest, but men also want to feel loved.

A man also wants to know he’s not just a sex object you turn to when you need a release; he wants to know you appreciate him as a person.

Of course, I’m not speaking about incels and damaged men here; I’m talking about those seeking a healthy relationship with a woman, and this is the kind of man you should want anyway.

When you appreciate such a man, being around him constantly releases his dopamine, which makes him associate you with good feelings.

9. Have a Sense of Humor

This is quite tricky as I don’t know if this can be developed, but I believe part of being intelligent is having a sense of humor.

So, if you develop your mind through reading, as point 1 says, you’ll be more inclined to relate to certain jokes. You’d be able to tell them and also make them.

This doesn’t mean you have to be a stand-up comedian; it’s okay if you’re not Dave Chappelle or Trevor Noah, but don’t be the grouch as well.

Laugh when he says something funny.

Make him laugh as well, or at least smile.

These are some things that fill one’s days with happiness and will make a guy enjoy being around him.

10. Be Solution Oriented

There are people who cause problems, those who always think of problems, and those who propose solutions.

If you are solution-oriented, he will find your mind attractive.

I have met people who make mountains of problems like an anthill. 

One such person is my friend.

This babe is so sound that when you bring an issue to her, no matter how big it is, she will help you see solutions and opportunities.

The truth is that big-shot organizations are looking for such; how much more, your guy?

Jackpot!

11. Give Great Counsel

Who wouldn’t be attracted to someone who gives great counsel?

We all have situations where we need a friend or where we need advice.

If you are your guy’s go-to for great counsel, your man will be impressed by your mind.

I have a friend who is invited to sit on boards of organizations, even in businesses she knows nothing about because she’s very intuitive and gives excellent counsel.

Over time, the leads of these companies have come to trust in her wisdom and pay a premium for having her on their boards.

Much more than these, her husband is so blessed to have her as his wife, and guess what?

He was first attracted to her mind.

12. Call Him Out When Need Be

In the first place, you don’t have to act like you like everything he likes to get him to like you.

In fact, you might put him off like the betrothed bride did to Akeem in Coming to America.

Somebody who only answers “whatever you like, my lord” is only interesting for a while.

As humans, we love challenges, so you’ll not get him to fall in love with your mind when you accept everything he says, hook, line, and sinker.

If he suggests a restaurant you don’t like, be bold enough to let him know you don’t like it while also understanding the place of compromise, especially if it’s his favorite.

But you don’t have to pretend to like everything he likes.

Also, don’t be afraid to call him out on a mistake if he makes one.

Of course, you shouldn’t do it publicly; most men have fragile egos.

Plus, it’s wise to correct people privately, except in extreme cases like when a crime is involved.

Without being rude or stubborn, tell him he’s wrong when he is.

It gives off the vibes that you are not flaky and you have a mind of your own.